my life

We all woke up a bit knackered today after the drinking session we had the night before.

And as people were waking up at different times and in different places on the park, breakfast was a little less organised today.

We were told to eat whatever food was left and given the choice of standing around cooking or just emptying some cereal into a bowl, we all went for the second option.

Giv had seen an advertisement for ‘innertubing’ down the nearby river and all bar a few decided it was a good idea.

When the troops were organised we set off to the place where we would pick up our large rubber rings to cart down to the river.

It was nothing like white water rafting I can tell you.

It was a leisurly 2 hours of bobbing around in the water as we headed down stream.

It was immense fun though! One minute you were right at the front and the next thing you knew, you’d hit a rock and you’d be the last of about 25 people as they all drifted past you.

At one point, the only way through was via a small section of the river which wasn’t blocked by large boulders. This meant that we had to go very close to the edge of the river bank and the bushes which lined it.

As the first few of us went by someone noticed a snake hissing away in the bushes. It stared at us as we all went by, as we tried to stay as far away from it as we could.

Now none of us are snake experts so we couldn’t really tell what type of snake it actually was but needless to say, we’re in the middle of a desert in America. It could have been anything, and we didn’t want to stick around to find out.

After we’d finished our innertubing we were taken back to the campsite in a minibus and everyone was ready to set off to our next and final destination: Las Vegas.

We were told we had a 5 hour drive to look forward to and by this time the weather was VERY HOT!

As we boarded the bus, Concrete Jimmy suggested that, to cool down on the journey, we could have a water fight on the bus.

At this time everyone was too tired for any type of fighting but as the journey wore on and the heat started to become unbearable, the first splash of water was thrown….

Then the next, then the next.

Each person getting back the person who had thrown water over them – only more of it.

After about an hour, the entire water supply for the whole bus had been thrown, including the 10 litre drinking container and even the contents of the ice cooler where the beer once sat.

We were all completely drenched from head to toe – completely drenched and completely clothed.

It sounds very soggy but it was very welcome at the time. And from the heat of the place everyone was pretty much dry by the time we reached Las Vegas.

Ahhh, Las Vegas. The place of dreams for so many years!

Both of us being gambling men, we were instantly given the role of Gambling Advisors as we had probably done more gambling between us than the rest of bus put together.

As soon as we entered the first casino, Excalibur, I was been asked to coach a game of Blackjack that Nora was getting herself into and James was freely giving general tips on Roulette.

After our brief gambling spree we had all agreed to meet up in the ‘all-you-can-eat‘ casino buffet.

And the food was excellent! Almost anything you wanted to eat was there and all for $13. Not bad at all.

After many pieces of salmon and much chocolate icecream we were ready to hit the tables again – this time at the MGM Casino Grand, one of the largest casinos in Las Vegas (which probably means it’s one of the largest in the World).

As soon as we got there, I set out to find a ‘single zero’ table as I knew the order of the numbers better – there was just one in the whole building and it was a minimum bet of $25.

Reluctantly I changed $40 so that I could put my ‘area‘ bet on and waited for the right time.

And the time was right. No sooner had the ball dropped, I was $100 richer. Boom!

Everyone seemed amazed by this – not least me.

I decided to quit while I was ahead and we all headed off to another table with a slightly lower minimum. $10.

This time James had a flutter and after a few ups and downs and all the free drinks we could drink (beer too – not just the usual Coca Cola) we went off to a slightly easier game which everyone could play.

And everyone did. It was basically just a big wheel with loads of 1s, less 2s, even less 5s and so on until there was one 40.

If you stuck a dollar on a 2 and it came in you got odds of 2-1 (so you got 3 back). Dan and Sanrda did particularly well at this game having predicted two 20s each – Me and James did not do so well. Kids games ;)

More gambling and 6 hours later it was time to board Sammy for the last time.

We were sleeping on soggy mattresses through the night and slowly making our way back on the Tortoise to San Francisco, California.

We arrived at Bryce Canyon quite early and started to cook breakfast.

A few of the hardcore among us set off on a hike down to the bottom of the canyon – we decided (along with the majority of the group) that after the long hikes of the previous few days to take a casual walk around the rim to take in the sites.

If you had taken me straight from the middle of Hull and plonked me at the Bryce Canyon I would have probably been amazed by the shear size and natural beauty of the place – unfortunately, by that time, I was completely canyoned out.

Bryce was different though. Not nearly as vast as the Grand Canyon but the rock monoliths really were a breathtaking site to see. We meandered around for a coupled of hours before boarding the bus to our next destination: Zion.

On the way to Zion we passed another Green Tortoise bus embarking on its final leg of a 16 day journey through desert country. We didn’t know this at the time but it turned out that they were actually going to Zion as well.

When we arrived at Zion we drove through the mountains and set up camp in the centre of the canyon.

What an amazing site! And the whole place was so hot. If you can imagine the hottest place you have ever visited then think hotter – it was 49?C (120?F) and we were all feeling it. Even the wind (which was quite strong) was like switching a hair dryer onto the highest temperature then holding it directly to your face. As night drew in, the place started to cool down, but only slightly.

It was Maddie’s birthday today so we all decided to get a collection together and buy her a few presents.

As we sat around watching her open various kid’s toys like bubble making kits, dress-up paper dolls and a ‘How to Draw Pretty Pictures’ book we sang happy birthday and all shared some cake and a bottle of Moet & Chandon.

News was coming through that the other bus had arrived along with all sorts of stories of what they had all been getting up to.

They all seemed like a crazy bunch and it seemed like it was mostly due to the driver who fancied himself as a bit of a slut. Apparently he’d slept with no less than 7 of the girls on the bus – perks of the job I suppose.

In addition to that, the night before he had laid out some tarpaulin on the ground which he then proceeded to pour cream, chocolate and maple syrup onto. What started as a messy fight turned into a mass bus-wide orgy – apparently.

We all agreed that we were quite happy on our bus and with Concrete Jimmy. He’s alright he is!

We started to mix with the crowd from the other bus and the night turned into the biggest piss-up of the whole trip. We all had a great laugh and met some interesting folk: a mad woman called Olga, 2 girls from Hull and a German who had reportedly taken over 2000 photos on his digital camera, of anything he could.

From the stories we’d heard he could probably make a packet selling some of them for bribes. We spent another night under the stars, spread out and mixed up between the 2 buses and our new friends.

As you can imagine, with 36 people eating, sleeping and travelling on a bus for the past 6 days, Sammy was getting a tad disgusting. So before we set off from The Valley of the Gods we took everything off the bus, shook it off and put it all back on again.

After everyone had taken all their bags off, there was a big pile of ‘lost property’ to rummage through. I managed to find my swimming shorts (at last!) which was fotunate as today was planned as a swimming day.

Given that we were all pretty disgusting by this time, a good wash in a river was beginning to sound very welcoming.

We got back onto the bus and headed off to a place called ‘Mexican Hat‘.

There was a river flowing though Mexican Hat and as soon as we arrived everyone gladly jumped in for a swim. The river had quite a current and if you stayed afloat without swimming you were quickly whisked downstream.

There was a factory just above the river which was pumping something into it – God only knows what it was they were pumping into the water but I can’t imagine it was just more fresh water.

After about an hour of swimming, we set off for the next state, Arizona and a place called Lake Powell.

Lake Powell: hot

Lake Powell is an enormous lake which divides Utah from Arizona – you could literally swim from state to state (not that anyone did as the other side was a fair way away).

If you can imagine one of the hottest days you have ever experienced and the sun beating down on a river so blue and welcoming then you’d be close to the experience of Lake Powell.

We spent about 3 hours swimming in the lake and sitting on the rocky shoreline to dry off before setting off for the nearest town, where we were promised a meal in an Italian restaurant which served “Calzones as big as your head”.

When we arrived the place was heaving.

We had to wait about an hour before they were willing to seat 36 people. Now we would have probably booked something like that but Concrete Jimmy obviously didn’t think that was necessary.

The food was great though and after stuffing our faces with Calzones and Budweiser we were ready to spend another night on Sammy which would take us overnight to The Bryce Canyon.

We woke up in a different State this morning – today we are in Utah, the land of theMormons. Expecting not to be able to buy any alcohol we made sure to stock up with beer at The Grand Canyon. After driving a little longer we entered an Indian Reservation of the Navajo Indians. This meant that we had to set our watches an hour back while we continued our way through the dusty desert.

As if the bus wasn’t hot enough in the dry heat without air conditioning, it was time to close all the windows and tape up all the vents so as not to breathe in the dust from the rural roads. We finally arrived at Canyon de Chelly (pronouced ‘de Shay’) and started our hike down to the ancient Indian monuments and dwellings. Half of the group had travelled down on horses and we were due to meet them at the bottom and ride back to the top.

After about an hour we made it to the bottom where the locals were selling handmade jewelery from tiny stalls. The ancient dwellings and rock paintings were quite a magnificent site. Entire villages were built about 100ft up the rock face. As the other group arrived we clocked which horses seemed to be behaving themselves and started on our return journey on horse back.

It’s very different from horse riding in England – you have no helmets on and you can pretty much do what you want – and the horses seemed quite content in doing just that. Whenever our Indian guide give a whistle the horses were off – gallaping like hell! These things were fast!

We travelled through lakes, across the desert and through small groups of trees, stopping occasionally to learn about the various rock paintings and ancient settlements from our Indian guide. When we got back to the top of the Canyon we quickly boarded the bus to go The Valley of the Gods which is where we were due to spend the night. Save for the vast arrangement of mountains and desert, there is litterally nothing here. No streams, no animals and certainly no people. This did mean, though, that if you needed to go, you had to take a shovel, dig yourself a little hole and shit in it.

We both did it – you should try it, even just for the experience!

We set about cooking our dinner for tonight – Mexican food, and some of the best food we have ever tasted. It was getting dark and as we weren’t allowed to start a fire (a state law) we all set out some rocks around a large candle, sat on them and started drinking the beer we’d bought the previous night. Out came the guitar and we spent the rest of the night singing, telling stories and getting pissed in the middle of the desert. It finally got to that time of the night. We laid out our sleeping bags and fell asleep under the stars.

It’s another world here, it really is.